Because of you.

 :: soo many words yang broken because my english was very very bad. :) ::

:: Projek Bi, PDT sesi 2010/2011 ::

Tak perlu baca, sebab entri ni dipost sebagai backup. hahaha

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My name is Danea Natasya. Long time ago, I live with my parents at Retro City, the capital city of MetroRetro. My father and mother have been married when they both were 20 years old. My mother, Mrs. Natalia is a housewife who was always there for me and my father. A solid working man, Mr. David, my father is a high school teacher. 

Foregone, I always thought my family is the most perfect among the others. Yeah, they give me what I want. I had been a spoilt child. But, after my parents had divorced, it was when I was only nine years old. They had separate ways to separate worlds where I had no part between them. I’m important to them anymore. So, after they got divorced I never think about a happy family in my life.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

-1994-

“Mummy, mummy. I love this. It’s so cute. Can I have it?” Danea Natasya begging her mother to buy the doll for her. She was six years old and the only daughter of Mr. David and Mrs. Natalia. She wears a beautiful white goun. Since Danea Natasya is the only daughter, she has been pampered a lot by her parents. She always gets what she wants.

“Ask your dad, Tasya” said Mrs. Natalia to her precious daughter. 

“Daddy!” Tasya pull her father clothes. “Can I have this, daddy?” She asks her father while her hands hug the doll.

“Just take what you want, Tasya.” Mr. David smile to her daughter.

The child screaming of joy because her father agrees to buy that doll.

The family walks around the shopping complex. Mr. David will bring his family to spend time together every weekend because he always busy doing his work everyday, except the weekend.

“We should go home now because it was almost twilight and I have to prepare dinner for us.” While looking at her watch, she tells her husband. She thinks about the rush of making a meal that will hit her. It must be tired for her.

“Ermm, we eat at restaurant. Is it Okay?” Mr. David suggest to his wife. He doesn’t want his wife feel fatigue.

“Okay, I had no problem!” she reply and starts smile herself. 

After the family finished shopping, Mr. David drove his family to an expensive French restaurant where he and Mrs. Natalia always spent some time having drinks and food before they had married. They reached the restaurant at 8 pm. They take the most beautiful places in the restaurant.

“Do we always sit here before we get married?” Mrs. Natalia asks her husband when she remembers they always go to that restaurant before.

“Yes. You still remember that, darling. That’s why I take you here. It’s full with sweet memories between us. We hear the song, and we sing together.” Mr. David trying to recall his memory.

Mr. David stand up and go somewhere in the restaurant. When he back, heard the song by Petula Clark.  The three of them, Mr. David, Mrs. Natalia and even the little child, Natasya sing together with much of love.

You're the only one that I rely on
A shoulder there for me to cry on
And the hours alone that I'm without you
All I ever do is think about you


No one knows that you're so understanding
Even though my love is so demanding
Every time you look at me,
Then you'll know we'll both agree
That no other love could be

I couldn't live without your love
Now, I know you're really mine
I gotta have you all the time

Didn't like you much when I first met you
But somehow, I couldn't quite forget you
Said you didn't want a friend or lover
That your life was happy with another

But as time went by, my love grew stronger
Knew that I just couldn't wait any longer
For I couldn't let you go
And I had to tell you so
That I loved you, then you'd know

I couldn't live without your love
Now, I know you're really mine
I gotta have you all the time

Didn't like you much when I first met you
But somehow, I couldn't quite forget you
Said you didn't want a friend or lover
That your life was happy with another

But as time went by, my love grew stronger
Knew that I just couldn't wait any longer
For I couldn't let you go
And I had to tell you so
That I loved you, then you'd know

Now, the tears are gone and I'm not cryin'
When you say you love me, you're not lyin'
So, when people want to stare,
I know I don't really care
Just as long as you are there.

Just then a waitress came to the table with a meal. They had the great meal that night; pan roasted porcini powder dusted Hokkaido scallop with half cooked potato sliced, seared porcini mushrooms and white gazpacho vinaigrette. After finishing their main meals, they have a dessert. It was Natasya favorites. Pistachio and white chocolate cheesecake with Irish tea sauce, toasted pine nuts and pistachio cream filled Russian cigarette. That’s fabulous.

Suddenly, a woman came to their table with a smile. Mr. David seems like to know the woman.

“Hye, Dave. Am I right?” she asks Mr. David. Miss Ross is an old friend in high school of Mr. David. She is the most pretty and attractive girl in their school that time.

“How can I forget you, Ross Geller. Oh, this is my wife, Natalia and my daughter, Natasya.” Mr. David introduces his wife and daughter to Ross.

Mrs. Natalia and Miss Ross greet each other.

“Please have a sit,” Mrs. Natalia meet Ross.

Ross glances to Mrs. Natalia and she replies “Thanks, Natalia.”

“Much welcome to you,” Mrs. Natalia said without any suspicious to Ross. She don’t know that Ross even and still have a feeling to Mr. David.

“It was so long time we didn’t see each other. It’s almost 7 years, right? Oh yes, Dave! Do you know about our school reunion?” Ross presumes Mr. David. Ross is the leader of the reunion. 

“Owh, the reunion that you suggest. I read it at my e-mail. I’ll go if I don’t have any work to do”. Mr. David said properly.

At the same time, when Ross want to say something, Natasya said with spoilt voice, “Daddy, let’s go back home. I feel so sleepy.” She doesn’t really like the women.

“Ok... It’s time for us to back home,” Mr. David gave a positive answer to his daughter.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Actually, my father and Aunty Ross had a relationship before he met with my mother. 

I don’t really remember the first time I meet Aunty Ross because I was only six years old that time. Maybe it was the beginning of my father and Aunty Ross relationship. Aunty Ross existences and their affairs already give us bad luck in our life. 

As I remember, after the reunion of my father’s school, his behavior starts changed. Not too much but a little and little. He starts come back home late at night. Starts hiding himself, just to speak with his sweetheart in phone. And the most terrible things, he succeeds to hide his love relationship with Aunty Ross for almost four years. I really can’t forget the first time my parents get arguing each other. It’s keep being like that for about two month. That was the things I hate so much in my life.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

-1997-

It was 17 March 1997. Mrs. Natalia at the kitchen. She was crying. She saw a picture of her husband and Ross while she cleans up their bedroom. They seem so close in the picture. It’s startled herself. She never thought that Mr. David could do that to her. She feel so sad, and so down. She thinks about her daughter and their future.

          Mr. David just arrived home. He goes to the kitchen to get some water. He saw Mrs. Natalia wants to cook something and her eye was red. 

“Nate, are you just here to make some tears?” Mr. David trying to make a joke, but it’s not a joke anymore to Mrs. Natalia. 

          Mrs. Natalia just keeps silence. She doesn’t look at her husband.

          “Why? Did I make something wrong?” Ask Mr. David.

          Mrs. Natalia trying to bear her tears. But she can’t. She give him the picture without see her husband. 

“Dave, maybe you forget to pick your own picture. It’s lucky not our daughter found it,” she starts crying and continue speak. 

“How long?” She wants to ask about her husband and Ross relationship. But, she keeps crying.

        

  “Hey, what’s wrong with you?” Mr. David trying to defense himself. 

“This. Err… This an old picture. You know. Err.. It was when I’m still at high school.” He was lying.

         

 “How can you say that? I know it’s not an old picture. I can differentiate that! You have an affairs with that woman. Is it right? You never think about your family!” She was very mad. 

          “What you just saying? That woman? She is Ross! You know her.” Mr. David replies.

          Danea Natasya is at the kitchen door. She just stares to her parents. It was the first time she saw them arguing. She doesn’t know what to do. She just stands there, watching her parents.

          “I just can’t let it be!” Mrs. Natalia pushes her husband chest. She takes the picture and tears to a pieces. “Just broke it off!” Mrs. Natalia screamed.

Mr. David just keeps quite. He can’t leave Ross. He run gets his car key. He left home.

          The child didn’t say anything. She feels so scared. Hiding herself behind the table and her tears starts fall down.

         

 Mrs. Natalia made up her mind. She must do something to safe the family. She will try her best to discuss that thing nicely.

That night, Mrs. Natalia cooks something special to her husband. She prepares the meal. It’s a candle light dinner. She talks to Danea Natasya,

 “My dear, please do something to make your dad happy, appreciate our family”. She almost burst into tears. 

“We wait for your dad and then we eat together.”

          “It’s strange. Mum and dad never be like that before.” She talks slowly and her face seems so sad. She walks to the living room, waiting her father while watching the television.

          “Tasya,” she wants to wake Danea Natasya up.

          Danea Natasya opens her eyes slowly. “Mummy, I’m hungry..” She touch her stomach.

          “Let’s eat first. Maybe your dad came back a little bit late.”  She just says that.

          The two of them eat silently. Without any jokes as usual. They eat, but it’s seems like they do not have appetites anymore.

          Mrs. Natalia still waits for her husband after she had meals with her daughter. She just waits at the table and waits. Her daughter also takes part. Until it more or less 12 pm. She give up! She tosses the food and cried. She goes to her bedroom. Danea Natasya just see it, she starts walks to her bedroom and have a sleep.

The last day they arguing, Mr. David back home after works. He tired thinking about his future. Last night, he set off to see his beloved Ross. She coaxes him not to leave her.

 ‘Please don’t leave me again, Dave. I’ve been suffered for a long time before.  Please don’t do this again to me. I begged you Dave….’ 

He remembered what Ross said last night.

One day, Danea Natasya just sitting at the stairs. Watching her parents discussing something she does not know.

          “Please think it clearly. Dave, I really don’t want our family destroyed.” Mrs. Natalia said politely.

          “I can’t leave Ross. She’s pregnant.” He replied. Like nothings going on.

          Mrs. Natalia’s heart sank. “Take a look of our daughter.” She pointed her finger to Danea Natasya. “You can’t leave that woman but, you can leave your own daughter. What have that unless woman do to you?” she said with sad tone even she feel so sad.

          “What did you say? Unless woman??” Mr. David pushes the table in front of him. He really gets angry because he don’t like Ross being humiliate like that. For him, Ross is the most perfect woman.

          Mr. David pounce their latest family picture and he tear it into pieces. “This! Now, it’s done between us!”

          They shouted to each other. An impatient tone heard at Danea Natasya ear.

          Suddenly, Danea Natasya threw her doll to Mr. David. Doll that have buy by the father when she was six!

          Mr. David took the doll and threw it outside after he made some damages to it.

          “I hate you Daddy!!!” Danea Natasya immediately go to her room. She was very disappointed with her father.

          Mrs. Natalia took the top off the first thing she found and threw everything that she reached. “Just go to your horrible little woman!” she shouted.

          Mr. David goes somewhere to calm down his tempered.

          Danea Natasya just cries in silence. She occasionally saw that scene where her parents throwing everything in their home.

The next day, Mr. David packed up everything belong to him. He goes to leave that home. Her daughter helps him to move his bag to the car. She thinks her father will take her for a vacation. It was terrible. That was the last time Danea Natasya sees Mr. David.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

After my parents divorced, I only stay with my mother. We live in hard way. My mother has to find a work. My father runs away with his girlfriend. Ross Gellll, whatever her name was. I hope they live happily in their own world.

I often saw my mother crying in her room. Ever one time, after I back from school, I saw my mother crying. She even takes pills. I heard my mother crying every night in her sleep. I feel very sad but I can’t cry in front of her because I know that’s the weakness in her eyes. But still, I have to make her happy. I tell her every funny story about my friends and much more. I tell my mother not to sad anymore. 

“I always be in your side Mummy, in any condition. I won’t leave you alone.”

“Thank you, my dear.” My mother replies and hugs me.

Until one day, when I was 13 years old, my mother can’t bear the burden anymore. She keeps being humiliated by other people, include my neighbors. She always changes workplace, because she being bullies by other employees. I saw with my own eye. How she kill herself. I can’t forget that damn thing even I try my hardest. I only can cry in front her body. It’s very hard for me. My father runs away from my life and my mother died. But, I can’t fell just because of those things.

After two month, I move to small town. I live with my grandmother and grandfather, Mrs. Lucy and Mr. Harry. They were my mother’s parents. They are very nice to me since I was the only grandchildren that they have. I love them very much. No body can replace their place in my heart.

I have move to new place. So, I could have a new life there too.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

-2001-

This is the first time Danea Natasya step into her new high school. She changes her appearance and attitude. It’s because she wants to starts a new life there..

          

 She goes to her new class, accompanied by her class teacher, Ms. Mimi. 

“Class, we have a new student here, Danea. Danea, please introduce yourself,” said Ms. Mimi to Danea Natasya.

Automatically her hand shows some respect. “All right Miss...” she said it unexpectedly.

The students in the class laugh.

“Opps, sorry Miss. Class, class... Let I introduce myself first.” She stops talking and smile. 

“Hye, my name is Danea Natasya. You all can call me Danny. I’m new here. Just move to this place last week from Retro city. Ermm, any questions?” ask her.

A girl stand, “My name is Sabina and have a question. Err... Danny, why you move here?” She said eagerly.

Danea Natasya surprised with that question but she tried to answer it. “Yes.. I move here because… My mother just died last month, but I stayed here with my grandmother and grandfather.” She said it calmly even she feel sad. But, she still smiles to her new classmates.

Suddenly, heard a voice. “Where’s your father?” Danish ask.

“You ask it?” Danea pointed her finger to a boy who had asked that.

The boy nodded her head.

“The truth is, I don’t know where he is now and I don’t want to know about him, where he goes. So, don’t even ask me about my father again, yah!” Said Danea Natasya in a very different tone. 

“It’s your turn to introduce yourself to me!” She said it with a happy voice to her classmates. She also wants to know about them.

All conversation among them was of the happiness and joy. Her classmates extremely friendly. It was a huge opportunity for her to forget the pain.

Few days in the school, Danea Natasya already gets a best friend. They were Sabina, Rosy and Dahlia. They live near her place.

          

 The four friends go to a garden in their school during rest time. They just have a talk.

“Danny, you sure you don’t have any boyfriend in Retro City?” ask Dahlia suspiciously.

“Why are you asking like that, Dahlia?” Danea Natasya feels weird with that question.

“Yeah… You’re pretty,” Rosy take a look to Danea’s face.

“I just.. Not interested in man.” Danea thinking what have she said.

 “Ah, doesn’t mean I have interested in woman yeah!”

“Owh… I thought you’re homooo. Hahaha..” Dahlia makes a little joke for them and they laugh.

“Hey, don’t even think like that, I’m not that kind of human.” she shouted. “I don’t believe man. Except my grandpa.” Danea Natasya wants to explain it, but something disturbs her. And she laughs again.

“You should change your appearance, Danny. Just be a little bit girly.” Sabina give her an advice.

“No!! I like being like this. It’s natural with me, right.” Danea defense herself.

Suddenly, a voice of a ring heard. The rest time had finished. They should back to their classroom.

“It’s time to go home. Yeahhhh!!! I like this time. Grandma! Grandpa! Wait for your beloved grandchild!!!” Danea Natasya should shout that. She feels free after she had a bored class.

Arrived at her grandparent’s house, she pointed to the kitchen. She smells something interesting. It was her favourite food, a French dessert, white chocolate cheesecake and also pistachios. 

          “That’s why I love you so much grandma..” Danea Natasya hugs her grandmother and gives a kiss to her.

          “Let’s eat that cake,” said Mrs. Lucy. “Where’s your grandpa?” she ask Danea Natasya.

          “Umm,” Danea looks her watch. “He must arrive later.”

          “Hey, both of you. What have you talk about me..” Mr. Harry said it with joke tone.

          Both of Danea and her grandmother fells surprised.

          “Don’t ever do this again. I can die because of heart attack, you know?” said Mrs. Lucy to her husband.

          “Rule in the kitchen. Can’t have a fight there.” Danea Natasya laughs slowly.

 “Let’s taste this grandma, grandpa.”

          “Whoa.. It’s so tasty, grandma. Did you make it yourself? It’s more delicious than at the restaurant one.” She remembered something.

          “Of course I made it myself, my dear. You don’t believe me?” ask Mrs. Lucy.

          “It’s not like that grandma. Sooo delicious.” She praises her grandmother again. She stop eating.

 “Ah, I remember something. When I was six, mummy, daddy and I go to Italian restaurant. Where daddy meet that bad girl. I remember ‘how can I forget you, Ross Gelll’ whatever,” she said it with hate tone. And she laughs.

          “Forget that moment, Tasya. Its make your heart hurt. Just eat.” Mr. Harry said occasionally he feel so pity for her poor grandchild.

          “Well, I don’t really remember that time.” She tried her hard to forget that scene. “I like pistachios,” she smiles.

After five years, Danea Natasya had an exam. She studied her best. It is because she wants to get into university. She wants to reciprocate her grandparent’s who had grown her until she can stand in her own foot. Without them, she believes she can’t accept what had happen to her. She almost follows her mother actions. It’s lucky they had helped her.

          With her effort, she get flying colour for her result.

          “Grandma! Grandpa! Take a look of this!!!” Danea Natasya shouted it a few times.

          “Owh, my genius grandchild. You have made it, dear.” Said Mrs. Lucy, praises her grandchildren.

          “Prove to this world. You also can success like others.” Mr. Harry gives some spirit to Danea Natasya. He really proud of his grandchild.

          “Thanks. Thanks grandma. Thanks grandpa.  Because of you, I had made it. Wish I can get into university” Danea hugged her grandparents.

Danea Natasya has been offered into University of Quokka in Computer Engineering undergraduate. She really admires that course since she was 13 years old and she must go for it. One more thing, she wants to get a degree or more than that.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

-2011-

Now, Danea Natasya in her last semester at University of Quokka. She was 23 years old. She take a seat in a park near her hostel. Just listen to music while thinking something about her future. Mrs. Lucy gives a call to her last night. 

“Tasya, last day, someone came to our house. He asks about you. He also asks your telephone number.” Said Mrs. Lucy nicely.

          “Who was that? Did I know him?” ask Danea Natasya eagerly.

          Mrs. Lucy smile. “He was your high school classmates. If I’m not wrong, his name is Danish,” she explains.

          “Owh, that boy. I remember him. Erm… just take it easy grandma. I don’t want to have any scandal right now,” she replies with a big laughs.

          “Okay. If that’s what you want.” Mrs. Lucy satisfied with her grandchildren answer.

          “Send my regards to grandpa, yah! Muaahh..” Danea replied.

‘Humm… I’m so sorry Danish. My heart not opened for a man yet. I can’t fix my heart right now.’ She said it little by little.

          She stands up and run for one more round. Forgetting the entire problem she had and focuses to her study.

“Here I come, degree!!!” she shouted.

Hope u stand up, say it together..